The purpose of this website is to serve as an online presence for my art, however I could not make art if I were not alive. As it stands, I have come very close to being not alive several times since 2016, and I’d be lying if I said that experience didn’t affect my work. What’s more, I’d be ethically remiss if I did not use every public platform I have to speak about what was done to me, in hopes I can spare others from sharing my fate.

My Story

In October of 2016 I ingested one 750 mg dose of the Fluoroquinolone (FQ) antibiotic Levofloxacin.  It was prescribed it for a bacterial infection that (according to two doctors I saw prior to receiving the prescription) my body had already metabolized.  When I told this to the prescribing doctor, he yelled at me over the phone- intimidating me with horror stories about this bacteria that in retrospect were inconsistent with all the information I can find on it. 

Two days later the back of one of my knees gave out walking up one flight of stairs.  I was 29, and in the best shape of my life.

Initially the connective tissue damage seemed to be the most significant aspect of the FQs effects.  It struck my knees and ankles worst, and five months out my knees were still not working correctly so needed to take time off of work.  It was during this time that someone falsely reported me as suicidal, and I was hospitalized against my will.  

While hospitalized I was barred from doing my own research on the drugs they pressed on me.  A simple visit to drugs.com would have warned me that Lexapro was contraindicated with FQs.  This is important, a certain portion of FQ victims develop FQ type reactions to other, non-FQ drugs (most prominently NSAIDs and corticosteroids).  Instead the only warning I was given was a printout that went on and on about "Quinolones"- a shortening of a word I had never said aloud- which I did not recognize as "that long word that begins with an "F"".  Under the threat of being held indefinitely, I took two does of the Lexapro.  I woke up the first day lethargic and with neck pain, but wrote it off.  By the second day I was unable to walk down the hall without leg braces- my knees were so weakened by renewed FQ type damage.

At this point I assumed I just had to avoid those 300 or so contraindicated drugs for the rest of my life.  Then a month later I administered some St John's Wort, a drug I had used several times without issue prior to the Lexapro, but after the FQ.  Over the next 16 hours I suffered the worst reaction I've ever had- targeting my groin, inner thighs and linea alba.  The tissues were so weak that I had to go two months without speaking, laughing, crying, or sneezing.  These actions alone were enough to aggravate the damage and prevent it from healing.

At that point the most sinister aspect of the FQ's effects was revealed.  St. John's wort is not contraindicated with FQs, but it is contraindicated with SSRIs like Lexapro.  They were forming chains.

What's worse, unlike the FQs and SSRIs, St John's wort interacts with foods not listed on drugs.com.  The reactions began to spiral out of control, forming new links in the chain.  Highlights include turmeric, chocolate, the Marcaine I used when trying to harvest my stem cells, as well as 2nd hand cigarette and marijuana smoke.  The last two would cost me my home of 7 years.  My neighbors literally smoked me out of my apartment.

These reactions ultimately made me unemployable, and won me my SSDI case.  I had income, but I was down to less than a dozen foods I could safely eat.

Over the summer of 2019 I happened upon a study employing full body infra red saunas to remove DNA adducts.  There are multiple theorized mechanisms accounting for the different kinds of damage FQs can do, but DNA adducts seemed a better explanation for my reaction chains than oxidative stress, mitochondrial dysfunction, or gut biome die off.  I was down to less than a dozen foods- and it only seemed a matter of time before I would lose more, if not all of them, so I took a chance.

It paid off.

Unfortunately the infra red treatment could only remove reactions if they are no longer present in my diet or environment- so early on I regained the ability to handle my paint solvents and a few other things I had been reacting to via skin contact, but I was still reacting to most foods.  It took 9 months to get the elimination diet right, but I was ultimately able to remove all my reactions.

I hoped to return to work, but in order to do so I needed to know I could be around other people's food residues.  I had been aware for some time that FQ residues are present in all non-organic meat and dairy (except US poultry, goat, and lamb).  The question was- could they restart my reaction chain in such small amounts?  After one month of eating normal meat and dairy, I tested a 1st degree contraindication, and I got my answer.  The chain had restarted.  The reactions were weaker, perhaps proportional to the amount of FQ in my system- but they were undeniable.  I would never be able function in a shared workspace again.

After another round of treatment, I resolved to just focus on painting.  It was less important than teaching, but I was good at it, and it had its own meaning.  At this point we were in the first summer of COVID, and I was living on the first floor with neighbors who don't mask walking around outside my window.  As such I used dehumidifiers in place of an AC, so I could seal my windows.

The summer heat would prove too much for the machines, and in August one began leaking refrigerant gas- and I reacted to it.  The reaction was mild, so I replaced the dehumidifier and planned to do another round of treatment to remove the reaction link come winter.  I never got the chance.

In September someone- likely my landlord or one of his agents, used an unidentified but conspicuously smelling chemical in the basement- which came through my bedroom.    The reaction was minor, but soon I was reacting to my solvents, and all but two of my foods.  Things had spiraled out of control again.  

I resolved to get as much treatment in as I could before the heat came on in October.  I theorized (correctly it would turn out) that since it was oil heat I might react to the burn off, as I was already reacting to the fumes from my paint solvents (which are just simple hydrocarbon chains).

The treatment worked- partially.  I suspect it was either hydrocarbons released from heating food, or else the gasses my own body produces that kept it from being fully effective.  I got back my six core foods, but was still reacting to the burn-off from the heater.  As luck would have it, the burn off... finished burning off, and I resolved to finish this painting before things fell apart again. 

I had another close call while working on the painting that would be a testiment to this hellish experience. I did another round of the infra red treatment, got back a few foods and did the painting of my former student with the hammer. By then I had learned that the infra red treatment was not going to save me, so I tried another route that had served as a theoretical backup- using urolithin A to kill off my damaged mitochondria.

As luck would have it, it worked.  It is at present unclear if the reactions are gone, or if they are just greatly reduced and prolonged exposure to certain high potency chemicals can still harm me. I had some weird experiences following a dentist visit, and I don’t tend to sit in second hand smoke long enough to see if it damages me. At the very least, I can walk through it now where as in the past one breath was at least a month worth of damage.

I was able to move into a safer housing situation and will continue to monitor how my body deals with air pollution, vigilantly avoiding Fluoroquinolones and their residues for the rest of my life.

I tell this story in the hopes that it can prevent others from having their lives destroyed by these horrible- and in their redundancy- largely unnecessary drugs.  The entire Fluoroquinolone class- Cirpo, Avelox, etc carry these dangers- and many others that haven't affected me personally.  Unless you've been exposed to anthrax, there is always a safer drug.  (FQs are, to my knowledge, the only thing that treats anthrax).

I will continue painting as long as my body allows me.

Enjoy.